Before:In my opinion a good friend doesn’t make you change your style or your personality and doesn’t force you to do things. This connects to elements in the reading because they say that the smallest group is almost always family since you are truly who you are around your family. You will definity be a little different if you are raised with mostly online interactions but you will find other people that will also most just be online and you can bond in person by talking about their shared online interactions. 

After: In my opinion a good friend never makes you change your style or personality and doesn’t force you to do things you don’t like or make you uncomfortable. This connects to some aspects of the reading since in the reading they refer to having the closest people in your life being your family since you will always be around your family. You will be quite different if you are raised on just online interactions, but you should be able to find other people that have been through life mostly online as well and you can bond with those people in real life through ways you would bond online.

In my revision of this paragraph I focused on making more smooth transitions in the wording, like I thought the first sentence was very choppy at first so I revised that to become a bit more smooth. Some of my revisions was just adding commas in for the grammar aspect, but most of them just where making some adjustments to the flow of the words throughout the paragraph. This exercise definitely helped me with spotting my grammatical errors in my writing and showed me how to make my sentences less choppy.